I sat in my bedroom the whole of Sunday the 2nd of December feeling very funny and low. After asking myself what the trigger was, I remembered that I always get like that a day to the 3rd of December every year for the past 8 years.

I had the opportunity and rare privilege of being the wife and partner of the most wonderful, loving, industrious, God fearing and kind man. Life could not have been better than that because I was living every woman’s dream.

The best of everything was at my disposal whether I lifted a finger to work or not. We had our ups and downs as usual but making up and resolving our issues, was magical. I was blessed with the best husband and father and his name is JAIYE ABODERIN. He was the love of my life and the one who did everything humanly possible to protect his family. Even in the face of all sorts of problems, all sorts of accusations, all sorts of misconceptions, he was one who understood the true meaning of for better or worse.

Jaiye passed away on the 3rd of December 2004 at a time our dreams and projects were about to kick off. I was 26 with two lovely children and eight thousand naira in my account. Let me not sound like a broken record because I have told this story several times.

The one thing I would like to say is that, his life taught me unconditional love and his death taught me kindness. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to share his air, his thoughts, dreams, hopes, love, friendship and much more.

I have since discovered that if a marriage is not based on trust and friendship but most importantly, the love of God, then I am sorry it will never stand the test of time. I have been there and I know how things can fail right before your eyes without those elements.

So, today I celebrate a man of the people,

I celebrate a man who stood by his family through thick and thin,

I celebrate a man who touched and saved lives,

I celebrate a man who was a hero to all who knew him,

I celebrate a man who was a father to all who knew him,

I celebrate a man who loved unconditionally,

I celebrate a man who believed in sharing and caring,

I celebrate a man who put a smile on people’s faces,

I celebrate a man who was so full of life,

I celebrate a man who brought people together and created friendships even in death,

I celebrate a man who was a bigger star in his own right than most of us,

I celebrate a man who celebrated people without holding back

and I celebrate a man who will always be celebrated.

Rest in peace OBIM, the girls will always remember you and pray for your soul to rest in God’s arms. You will always be in my heart and the love I have for you will never ever die.

It has been eight years but it feels like only yesterday. Instead of crying I choose to celebrate you.

To those of you reading this, remember to give God glory for the life well spent no matter how short. He was a very happy man who hated gloomy faces. As you remember him please wear a smile and pray to God. He will love that very much.

God bless you all, now and always.

A QUOTE I GOT FROM JAIYE: No matter how many times you fall, as long as you are alive, you still have a chance to get up and try again.

Stella Damasus