I am an avid reader of your column, a 35-year-old married man and a professional based in Lagos. I have just heard the most shocking news of my life. During a recent argument, my wife had requested that I vouched on the fidelity of my mistress and I was ready to swear that she was absolutely faithful. However, before agreeing to swear to the oath, I called up my mistress and demanded she confirmed I was the only one she had been with in the four years we had been together. She confirmed I was the only one she has had sex with, but warned that I must not take any oath on her behalf.

You can imagine the shock and surprise I felt when weeks later, she admitted she has had sex with two other men, save that she had been raped by the men in 2007. I recall that she had told me in 2007 that her landlord got some thugs to invade her residence.

I had demanded from her then if the men assaulted her and she had flatly denied. Of course, hearing the news of the rape broke me and I
sympathised with her but I also wondered what else she must have been hiding from me all these years.

I trusted her so much that I was ready to divorce my wife to marry her. I had even instructed my lawyer to hand over the sole landed property I had to her should I die untimely. Now I seem to be in a fix. I still love but I’m not sure I can trust her again. I’m tempted to give my wife a second-chance, but can’t leave my mistress especially at such a delicate time as this. What do I do?